"How to Shut Up an Atheist if You Must" PART TWO

Authors Dinesh D’Souza and Robert Hutchinson skillfully answer, once again, the atheist’s pet questions about the existence (or non-existence) of God and how Christianity has allegedly made the world suck. Suck, for you thick atheists, is a slang word which means to make or to be really, really crappy (kind of like how our culture becomes anytime you guys mess with it).

These books will be especially beneficial for high school and college students to draw upon when their secular anti-God fuming delirious instructors start railing against God and Christianity.

For instance:

1. When the prissy anti-Christs tell you the Bible stands in the way of science, inform them that the greatest scientific geniuses in history were devout Christians—and scientists from Newton to Einstein insisted that biblical religion provided the key ideas from which experimental science could develop.

BWAHAHAHAHA! Does the image of a prissy anti-christ storming through the world hellbent on Armageddon strike anyone else as funny? Maybe he didn't mean the Revelations inspired "antichrist" but rather people who are against jeebus. Wow, it is hard to hold on to what he is saying.

"The mystical trend of our time, which shows itself particularly in the rampant growth of the so-called Theosophy and Spiritualism, is for me no more than a symptom of weakness and confusion."
- Albert Einstein

"The idea of a personal God is an anthropological concept which I am unable to take seriously."
- Albert Einstein

Yeah, Einstein was ALL about the jeebus factor in his work.

2. When the pissy God haters tell you the Bible condones slavery, you can remind them that slavery was abolished only when devout Christians, inspired by the Bible, launched a campaign in the early 1800s to abolish the slave trade.

Look pal, you obviously know how to use a thesaurus, I would love to know which one so I could predict your next randomly chosen derogatory term. Atheists do not hate god! Grab a dictionary, enlighten yourself. An atheist is a person who has looked inside themselves and said.... "Do I believe in god?" "Nope, no belief in god in me." That person does not then say, "I HATE GOD!" I'll tell you what a lot of atheists do hate though, is the IDEA of god. But that is a topic for another time. You cannot hate it, if it doesn't exist.

Despite the disappearance of slavery in Great Britain, slavery was a way of life in the southern colonies of America and the West Indian colonies of the British Empire.

First Steps to abolishing slavery, "By 1783, an anti-slavery movement was beginning among the British public. That year the first English abolitionist organization was founded by a group of Quakers. The Quakers continued to be influential throughout the lifetime of the movement, in many ways leading the way for the campaign. On 17 June 1783 the issue was formally brought to government by Sir Cecil Wray (Member of Parliament for Retford), who presented the Quaker petition to parliament. Also in 1783, Dr Beilby Porteus issued a call to the Church of England to cease its involvement in the slave trade and to formulate a workable policy to draw attention to and improve the conditions of Afro-Caribbean slaves."

Have christians EVER considered Quakers to be devout chrsitians????? Did you know you can be Quaker without being christian? lol And poor Porteus actually had to convince the Church of England to stop its INVOLVEMENT in the slave trade. But here in America.... what made the abolition of slavery even possible. Words, words floating in my head, "unalienable rights... life...liberty...pursuit of happiness" something foundational there. Something created in the very fabric of our society. Who... who wrote those words? It's not a name that is surfacing it is a religious affiliation. Deist. The deists wrote those words. What did the deists believe? That the universe was created by a supreme being who got the ball rolling and then LEFT IT ALONE!!!!!!! Hardly devout christians.

3. When the screechin’ teachers tell you the Bible has been proven false by archaeology, hark back and show them that each year a new archaeological discovery substantiates the existence of people, places and events we once knew solely from biblical sources, including the discovery of the Moabite stone in 1868, which mentions numerous places in the Bible, and the discovery of an inscription in 1961 that proves the existence of the biblical figure Pontius Pilate, just to name a few.

"Each year a new archaeological discovery substantiates"..... Wow. They must have HEAPS of corroborating evidence. Cool! What examples do they provide, "1868 and 1961" BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! and what did they discover? a Moabite stone and that there was a dude named Pointius Pilate. OMG!!! The virgin birth MUST be true. Pontius Pilate LIVED!!!!!

4. When they get sweaty and tell you that the Bible breeds intolerance, refresh their memory with the fact that only those societies influenced by biblical teachings (in North and South America, Europe, and Australia) today guarantee freedom of speech and religion. Period.

Sweaty? As in perspiration? Do atheists get sweaty when they talk about the bible? I'd best refresh my anti-perspirant than. Sheesh, no sense stinking up my own blog. Does the bible teach intolerance?

black people bear the mark of cain and are inferior
homosexuals should be killed
witches should be killed
women should be seen and not heard
beat your children
slaves obey your masters
if a virgin is raped she must marry her attacker
if a woman doesn't yell loud enough when she is raped, stone her
if a woman commits adultery stone her but let the man live
if the wrong people are living in the land god wants you to inhabit, kill them all.

Yes, the bible is a hot bed of compassion and tolerance, loving kindness to others. As to the list of countries, sounds like parts of the British Empire to me.

5. When one of them queues up and quips that the Bible opposes freedom, smack ‘em with the fact that the Bible’s insistence that no one is above the law and all must answer to divine justice led to theories of universal human rights and…uh…limited government.

BWAHAHAHAH!!! The ideas for democracy came from ancient Greece and were suppressed in every way possible by the catholic church.

The following bible verses actively condone slavery... which is NOT a form of freedom.
Leviticus 25:44-46
Exodus 21:2-6
Exodus 21:7-11
Exodus 21:20-21 NAB
Ephesians 6:5
1 Timothy 6:1-2
Luke 12:47-48

6. When they tell you that Christianity and the Bible justify war and genocide, unsympathetically remind them that societies which rejected biblical morality in favor of a more “rational” and “scientific” approach to politics murdered millions upon millions more than the Crusades or the Inquisition ever did. Hello. “Atheist regimes have caused the greatest mass murders in history,” says D’Souza. Inside D’Souza’s book you’ll find little gems like, “The Crusades, the Inquisition, the Galileo affair, and witch hunts together make up less than 1% of the murders that have occurred during modern atheist regimes like Stalin, Hitler, and Mao.”

Stalin- raised christian political affiliation COMMUNIST
"Communism was a comprehensive, all-embracing religion and not simply a political party, political system or philosophy. This fact is illustrated by the numerous ways in which Communism embraced and attempted to promulgate peculiar quasi-religious (and often clearly anti-scientific) beliefs which had nothing all to do with politics or government. Although Communism typically touted itself as anti-religious and pro-science, it was, in fact, deeply anti-scientific and clearly a religion."

Hitler-
Hitler's Christianity. "In Mein Kampf, Hitler wrote: 'I believe that I am acting in accordance with the will of the Almighty Creator: by defending myself against the Jew, I am fighting for the work of the Lord...' As a boy, Hitler attended to the Catholic church and experienced the anti-Semitic attitude of his culture. In his book, Mein Kampf, Hitler reveals himself as a fanatical believer in God and country. This text presents selected quotes from the infamous anti-Semite himself."

Mao-
I can only assume that "Mao" refers to Mao Tse Dung or Mao Zedong. And what can we learn about good old Mao? He founded Maoism, the Marxist Communist religion and ideology founded by Chinese dictator Chairman Mao Zedong.
Yeah, he sounds like an atheist as well. NOT!

This is just a smattering of the various 411 fun the Christian is going to get as they plow through What’s So Great about Christianity and The Politically Incorrect Guide to the Bible.

Wow if this is a sample, one assumes the best the book has to offer, I am unimpressed, uninspired and certainly unwilling to shut up. Try again.

Senior pastor, college pastor and youth pastor: do yourself and your congregants a favor and teach this stuff to your church. Equip Christians to stand against the BS (belief system) of the atheists. The culture war is heating up, therefore make sure your people don’t stand intellectually naked and neutered before these no-God numb nuts.

Sorry pal, you're still intellectually naked and neutered.
"no-god numb nuts" *snerk* name calling is sooooooooo 3rd grade school yard bully type stuff.

Lastly, comfortable and cocky atheists, you had better brace yourselves. Hundreds of thousands of Christians and authors are about to read these books and, as stated, systematically dismember your old and haggard arguments.

Ohhhhhhh dismembered in time for Halloween. *shivers* Whose arguments are old and haggard? Why do I hear school yard children chanting, "I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you!"

In addition, everywhere I go and speak—be it in conferences, on the radio, on television or in print—I’m going to encourage the tens of thousands of Christians I address that every time and everywhere they get crapped on by an atheist with unfounded arguments to open their mouths and slam dance them with facts found in these two new brilliant books from Regnery.

Crapped on by atheists! Slam dance them. HA! Not with the tripe I've seen. Try again Regnery.

Tell the fat lady to sit back down on her humongous backside, false alarm!

As for you Doug Giles- you strike me as particulary exasperating, inconvenient and annoying. If only I knew of a short way to sum up that irritation, one simple easy word to convey my contempt for Doug Giles. That way I could say, “Doug Giles you are a xxxx”. I guess I will just have to reiterate that he is particularly exasperating, inconvenient and annoying. Doesn’t pack the emotional punch that I want it to have though. Rats.