Friday, October 31, 2008

Reg Golb

aka Butt Nugget, aka Glob I hereby lift the ban from my blog that was placed upon you.


First of all, as an atheist, I don't believe in eternal damnation. Or for the softer christians... I also don't believe in eternal banishment from god's presence.

Second of all, as a parent, no child should stay in a time-out for too long.

Third, while he may have learned nothing from our discussions, he gave Richard and the rest of us many opportunities to explain things fully, to chew on difficult subjects and to clarify our own thinking on various issues.

Fourth, I just don't stay mad that long and I'm over it. If he wants to bring his bat and ball back and play with us, it's ok with me.

Fifth, we haven't played smear the queer in YONKS! *snerk*

Happy Halloween

Took the kids trick-or-treating for the first time in many years.

My son as a ninja swordsmen.

The Master Swordsman and my daughter as a ninja clansmaster along with Vice President hopeful Biden campaigning a bit.

Two cool carved pumpkins found on a stranger's doorstep.

Thought of Joe and XO with this devil and his play girl.

And Presidential hopeful Obama had a good time as well.

Hope everyone had a safe and happy Halloween, I know that XO did. :)

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Islam is Fucked Up Part 4

Richard Guest Blogger not do it in Mogadishu, Somalia! Yep, another woman stoned to death.

Apparently she "stressed" that she wished to be subject to Sharia Law. So being stoned to death was better than a non-Sharia punishment. Exactly what would that punishment have been?

Oh, yes. The man gets no punishment at all. He can rape a woman, but has no need to kill her to cover up his crime, the Law will do it for him.

Thank you for the heads up Richard!

The fuckwitted woman was buried in the ground up to the neck, her head covered in a black bag, and

Thousands of people gathered Monday to witness 50 Somali men stone a woman to death after an Islamic court in the southern port of Kismayo found her guilty of adultery, witnesses said.

THOUSANDS of people gathered to witness the stoning. THOUSANDS. You fucked up twisted evil cunts.

Islam is FUCKED!!!! And Sharia Law is a barbarous evil. Now I feel ill.

SIL ly LOL cats

More fun can be had at I Can Haz Cheezberger

Sunday, October 26, 2008

no more excuses

If he can*, by god so can the rest of us.

World's fattest man weds friend's widow

Mexican Manuel Uribe, the world's fattest man in the 2007 Guinness Book of Records, married his friend's widow in a televised ceremony the US Discovery Channel dubbed My Big Fat Mexican Wedding.

Despite shedding 230 kilograms from 590 kilograms early on this year, Uribe, 43, had to be carried by a crane on his bed, where he has been confined for years, to the makeshift altar at a venue 30 minutes from his home.

"Daddy, Daddy tell us again how you got to the church on time?"

"Hyuh hyuh, why I travellded by crane son."

Why the fat mexican turned into a stupid hillbilly is beyond me. Do you suppose she is on top? I bet there's some nasty porn out there that could explain it to me.

Oh, and for family friendly porn, send me an email and I'll forward a snatch to you. Fun stuff!!!!!! And nearly safe for work.

*Get laid, that is. The fuck if I'm ever going to get married. Except perhaps to gain citizenship. That I would consider.

Saturday, October 25, 2008

I forgot my Mom's birthday

It's tomorrow. (Sunday October 26th) I feel like complete shit about forgetting it. There's nothing I can do that will negate the fact that I didn't remember in time to send her something. FFFUUUUCCCCKKKK!!!!!!!!! Not even a card.


I've been so wrapped up in my own little personal drama that I haven't thought about anybody but myself in months.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Merry Thanksgivoween

I have two large plastic totes filled with nifty cool Halloween decorations and 1/5th of my garage is dedicated to Chrismas decorations. And I'm really not sure I can be bothered this year with all the put it up, take it down. *sigh* So I've drawn out my decorating scheme. This outta keep me covered for awhile.

Thanks TraceyT for the idea!! :)

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Islam is fucked up: part 3

Sometimes even a spanking isn't good enough.

Trouble with your pre-teen wearing lipstick and slutty clothing? Or maybe the little pre-slut just won't let you diddle her pooter?

Well here's Ahmal Achmed Jazeer Alibaba the Conservative Muslim Uncle's advice, "Torch the little bitch. Douse her in keroseen, flick the bic and light her up."

Girl set alight for wearing lipstick

An 11-year-old girl has been set on fire by a relative in India's northern city of Jaipur for wearing lipstick and being inappropriately dressed.

Police say the girl suffered burns over 90 per cent of her body and her chances of survival are bleak.

They've arrested her great uncle who allegedly poured kerosene on the girl and set her alight yesterday.

Investigators say the 55-year-old man, a conservative Muslim, told the police he was enraged at the girl wearing lipstick and being scantily dressed.

But relatives have accused the man of trying to molest the girl and setting her on fire when she objected.


A big "fuck you" to any Muslim out there who doesn't strongly object to that "great" uncle's actions.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

what do you think of the presidential candidates

Yep, that about sums it up. Thanks LOLCats!!! :)

Islam is fucked up: part 2

Remember the couple who were cured of their smoking habbit (him) and asthma and liver disease (her) by an unusual "medical ritual" which involved being beaten with crash helmets and broom sticks and having their heads repeatedly bashed against a table?? Yeah, that one.

Well, three of the four medical professionals conducting the ritual, the couple's 19 year old son, a 21 year old male and a 23 year old male- who was given credit for the idea, are being charged with murder.

No word on the fourth assistant whose 15 year old daughter was beaten severely for walking in during the procedure.

Here is Pat Condell's latest video and his response to having his previous video censored by youtube.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

catholic priest

A priest books into a hotel and says to the receptionist, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."

"No," she says, "it's just normal porn.................... you sick bastard."

Why? Because fuck them, that's why.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Inflammatory Breast Cancer

There are no lumps, and it won't show up on a mammagram.

Symptoms of Inflammatory Breast Cancer

* Rapid increase in breast size

* Redness

* Skin hot to the touch

* Persistent itching

* Thickening of breast tissue

For more information click here.

Thanks to my dear brother Protium for a heads up on this!

Sunday, October 5, 2008

the real news

Anybody else feel like the only real news out there is Jon Stewart?

Friday, October 3, 2008

Islam is fucked up evil incarnate

Ramadan: A time for the Muslims (i.e. fuckwits) to starve themselves from sun up to sun down for 30 days in honor of the revelation of the Koran to Muhammed. After an entire month of self-denial, what better way to celebrate the return of the pleasures of the flesh than to head over to the relatives for food and fun?

Too bad that you and your wife have a few faults that the in-laws don't approve of. So how do they help you with your smoking problem and her asthma and liver disease? Why using the same time honored techniques the christians use with their children. They "beat the hell" out of them.

"I wish that all fathers of households stand forth and practice their role. They will use the rod and not permit their children to go astray. Firmness is needed in your world that is filled with laxity, permissiveness, and degradation. Your children have been misled by many who shall answer to the Father. As teachers they have failed in their role. Therefore, as parents you must succeed in yours." - St. Joseph, March 18, 1973

As the Bible tells us: "He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes" (Proverbs 13:24) and "Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell." (Proverbs 23:13-14)

Quoted from a site that shouts with glee over the joys of spanking your child.

Only this time the spanking is Muslim-style. Not with an open palm, wooden spoon, hair brush or belt. Oh no. When the relatives come a knockin' they are right head bangers and broom swingers. Oh, and you don't get to wear the crash helmet, they're going to beat you with it.

Not only that, but in the heat of the moment and glutted with the pleasure of beating the devil from these tainted Muslim relatives, the daughter of one of the "administers" of this time honored medical ritual walked in and got the ouchy end of the stick as well.

Here's the full article.

Two Malaysians die in medical ritual

How the fuck they get away with calling it a medical ritual is beyond me.

October 3, 2008, 11:42 am

KUALA LUMPUR (Reuters) - Two Malaysians died and one was severely injured in a ritual designed to help a man overcome his chain-smoking habit and to rid his wife of her asthma and liver diseases.

State news agency Bernama reported that four close relatives smashed the couple's heads on a table and beat them with crash helmets and brooms as part of a ritual to help them overcome their health problems.

Kuala Lumpur CID chief Ku Chin Wah said the ritual was suggested by the relatives who the couple visited as part of celebrations to mark the end of the Muslim fasting month of Ramadan, where they complained of their ill-health.

Perhaps you didn't read the "No Whingeing Allowed" sign when you walked in. Sucks to be you!

"Following this, a 23-year-old male relative suggested that the couple undergo a ritual which involved all family members joining forces to beat up the couple to rid them of their ailments," Ku told reporters on Thursday, according to Bernama.

The 15-year-old daughter of one of the four assailants walked in on the ritual, was severely beaten and was admitted to hospital, Ku said.

(Reporting by David Chance; Editing by Jeremy Laurence)

One thing I will say for them. The cure worked. He no longer has a smoking problem and her asthma and liver disease are thing of the past. Hooray for Islam.

In related news and as further evidence of Islamic yuckiness, I saw over at Sean's blog that Pat Condell's newest video has been banned by Youtube. Oh my dog Pat criticized the Muslims. RRRUUUUNNN!!!!!!!!!!!

Sean wrote: The video below was banned for terms of use violation. Titled "Welcome to Saudi Britain" it's critical of the Saudi's and Islam, not politically correct but hardly hateful. So why has youtube banned it. Because some touchy Muslim can't take a bit of stick and has a cry. I have seen videos openly supporting the KKK, do they get pulled?

So do Pat a favour watch the video (always good to examine things for yourself) then go to his site and grab the embed and post the video in your own post. And maybe if enough of a stink is made youtube will grow some backbone.

EDIT: It appears that after Hermant at the Friendly Atheist commented about it his videos were targeted.

And now for your viewing pleasure... Pat Condell on the growing influence of Islam.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Open Forum 18

Oi, it's the first of the month again. Or was... Yesterday. I thought about putting this up yesterday. And then I didn't.

So- the car's in the shop with a mysterious ailment:
1- awhile back left trunk partially open over night. with trunk light on the whole time, it necessitated a jump the next morning.
2- while driving with the interior light on it seemed to dim a bit for no particular reason (i.e. not decelerating)
3- parked and shut the car off. then when i tried to start it a few minutes later it acted like battery was dead, then started just fine immediately afterwards.
4- pulled up to traffic light and it died with the power steering cutting out first, then the dash lights coming on. had to put it into park and restart.
5- brake light came on intermittently until the day 3 & 4 happened at which point it started bing-bing-binging constantly. AARRGGGHHH!!!! With no discernable diminishing of brake fluid or loss of break usability.

So I dropped it off at the mechanics and hoped that he can fix it without costing me an arm and a leg which are already promised to the oral surgeon.

This is an open forum. If you've got questions ask and they shall be answered by the pompous windbag that runs this blog. MWAHAHAHAHAHA.

Sorry- I appear to have gone a bit nuts from the sugar high I just acquired from 15 Whoppers and 8 Peanut Butter Cups.

Jesus is my co-pilot

Hang on Jebus!!!!!!

Also entitled "How to tell when a Catholic is driving too fast".

My daughter sent me this from Montana, where she has spent the last month with my folks.

I love both my kids' sense of humor. It is so awesome to watch them grow into young adults capable of making me double over with laughter.