I am the unfortunate bearer of some rather horrifying information.
The CDC (Center for Disease Control) has issued a health advisory warning to all atheists in or visiting America. They are urged to avoid the southern states, and specifically places with warm water lakes, hot springs, and even dirty swimming pools
The reason for the warning is the unexpected peek in occurences this year. Between 1995 and 2004 there were 23 known cases, an average of a little more than 2 per year. This year, though there have been six cases reported already and more anticipated. The first symptom is a headache that will not go away. Typically misdiagnosed as meningitis, further symptoms include a stiff neck and fever. As the disease progresses hallucinations and behavior changes are typical.
The best way to prevent infection is to wear nose clips when swimming or playing in shallow water.
The disease, Logos Cephalis is caused by an amoeba that enters the body through the nasal passages and slowly eats its way into brain tissue. It is always fatal and no measures taken have slowed its progress in humans. From time of exposure, the disease runs its course in two weeks, leaving families bereft of their loved ones.
The cause is an ameoba, Naegleria fowleri, which lives in fresh water lakes and enters the body through the nasal passages and feeds on brain tissue.
Christians, especially fundamentalist and evangelical types are particularly resistant to this amoeba as they do not have sufficient grey matter to sustain the amoebas. Fanatical Muslims and other extreme religious people also show shocking resistance to this microscopic brain sucker.
The CDC is calling for all fundies to volunteer to help with warm water testing and various cleanup efforts as their unique brain make-up renders them almost perfectly invulnerable to this new threat. Scientists and rational atheists are urged to steer clear of any water teeming with believers as the amoeba become frenzied by the lack of functioning brain tissue.
For a full report, please see this AP article for full details.
Again- this ia health advisory from the U.S., to all atheists and rational people (but i repeat myself), swim with noseplugs!