Friday, July 19, 2013
Saturday, June 8, 2013
An Ode to God or Rabbit
Do you ever wish that you had someone in your life you could be completely honest with?
Not just someone to bitch about your spouse to, or bad mouth your boss/co-workers to, talk radical political ideals to, or wax philosophic with, I mean someone that you could share everything with and who wouldn't judge you, reject you or condemn you.
Someone to tell your very deepest secrets, fears, desires, dreams, hopes, wishes, fantasies, stories, memories, disappointments, well... everything to.
You can't do that with a spouse. You can't tell them of your fear or worries or negative thoughts, lest they pollute the relationship with your doubts. No sense clouding the waters with things they didn't realize, remember or ever even consider.
I think that is what God is for. And possibly even the Catholic confessional is for. A place to share everything. To receive absolution for your sins and to unburden your mind. To share your inner soul with someone or thing.
Unfortunately that option is not available to me. I am incapable of believing in God and would actively reject Him if He were to manifest himself to me for the evil that He allows on this earth in the name of "free will".
So what does that leave me? Alone, like everyone else in the universe, wishing for a deep connection with another human being.
I had that once, a friend I could tell anything to and be accepted and understood and reassured that everything would be ok. I miss you Philip. I'm sorry for the way things ended.
Not just someone to bitch about your spouse to, or bad mouth your boss/co-workers to, talk radical political ideals to, or wax philosophic with, I mean someone that you could share everything with and who wouldn't judge you, reject you or condemn you.
Someone to tell your very deepest secrets, fears, desires, dreams, hopes, wishes, fantasies, stories, memories, disappointments, well... everything to.
You can't do that with a spouse. You can't tell them of your fear or worries or negative thoughts, lest they pollute the relationship with your doubts. No sense clouding the waters with things they didn't realize, remember or ever even consider.
I think that is what God is for. And possibly even the Catholic confessional is for. A place to share everything. To receive absolution for your sins and to unburden your mind. To share your inner soul with someone or thing.
Unfortunately that option is not available to me. I am incapable of believing in God and would actively reject Him if He were to manifest himself to me for the evil that He allows on this earth in the name of "free will".
So what does that leave me? Alone, like everyone else in the universe, wishing for a deep connection with another human being.
I had that once, a friend I could tell anything to and be accepted and understood and reassured that everything would be ok. I miss you Philip. I'm sorry for the way things ended.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Marcus Aurelius
The movie Gladiator starring Russel Crowe and Joaquin Phoenix is truly a stunning piece. Emperor Marcus Aurelius was an extraordinary character played by the actor who played the original Dumbledore in this, his final roll.
I poached this from Joe's Mulligan of Life (thanks Joe!) an awesome new quote to add to any atheist's collection.
Of course the fundies have a bible verse to throw up in it's face,
8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast.
but that only shows what a smarmy book it really is trying to block all the loop holes and keep one scared of hell and eternal torture.
Well f that right in the a. Hell is a wicked and evil construct of a savage priesthood desperate for power and control.
I poached this from Joe's Mulligan of Life (thanks Joe!) an awesome new quote to add to any atheist's collection.
Of course the fundies have a bible verse to throw up in it's face,
Ephesians 2:8-9
but that only shows what a smarmy book it really is trying to block all the loop holes and keep one scared of hell and eternal torture.
Well f that right in the a. Hell is a wicked and evil construct of a savage priesthood desperate for power and control.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
For JOE from Joe's Mulligan of Life
Joe, saw this on DATING FAILS and laughed my ass off. Then I thought maybe you'd get a kick out of it as well. :)
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Fiery Down Under
I am heading back to Australia. This time I will be in Melbourne for 3 glorious months: November, December and January.
It is going to be very strange for me. The very dead of winter here with temps in the -30*F to 40*F and there the temps will be ....significantly hotter. I'm pretty sure my internal thermostat is going to have NO idea how to cope with blistering heat in what should be the dead of winter. LOL!
Can't wait to see how I handle it. If all goes well, Orion and I will be looking into making the situation permanent.
I'm just going to post this, I've started and have probably 5 drafts to this thing because I didn't know what to say and I'm so damned out of practice.
More later, hugs all around.
It is going to be very strange for me. The very dead of winter here with temps in the -30*F to 40*F and there the temps will be ....significantly hotter. I'm pretty sure my internal thermostat is going to have NO idea how to cope with blistering heat in what should be the dead of winter. LOL!
Can't wait to see how I handle it. If all goes well, Orion and I will be looking into making the situation permanent.
I'm just going to post this, I've started and have probably 5 drafts to this thing because I didn't know what to say and I'm so damned out of practice.
More later, hugs all around.
Saturday, July 28, 2012
next time
In just a few years this will be Orion and me saving for our retirement. My son is 15 1/2. He stopped counting the halves years ago, I haven't.
Getting pregnant when you're 19 annihilates your entire life that you COULD have had. The older I get, the harder it is to live with that decision I made so long ago.
The thing that keeps me sane? I can't thing of a single thing that I could go back and change that would mean I would still end up meeting and falling in love with Orion. And he, he has made all the difference.
Getting pregnant when you're 19 annihilates your entire life that you COULD have had. The older I get, the harder it is to live with that decision I made so long ago.
The thing that keeps me sane? I can't thing of a single thing that I could go back and change that would mean I would still end up meeting and falling in love with Orion. And he, he has made all the difference.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
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